Growing Self Love

Body image is something I think a lot, if not most, girls struggle with. However, not a lot of women want to admit to this. Whether it's just being overly critical or totally hating your body, it's miserable either way. I've struggled with this at different levels and now my body has taken on a very new round shape. A few years ago my body changing would have devastated me but working on self love has really helped me to love my pregnant shape. I actually feel pretty confident as a pregnant woman! I feel like I'll always be a little critical of myself but there are ways to get past the daily self shaming that I use to feel.

I can actually remember the day that I read a post from a girl (I wish I could remember who) that was about changing your own opinion of yourself. Most of us look in the mirror and criticize ourselves or think about what we wish we could change about ourselves. She wrote about how that kind of activity had to stop and the first step to loving yourself started with how you looked at yourself. Instead of looking in the mirror and degrading yourself, look in the mirror and find something positive. It doesn't matter if it's small or big but focus on that and take pride in whatever it is you like about yourself. Then walk away from the mirror, just walk away! Everyday she said she did this and everyday it was easier on her to love herself and realize that she was unique and she wouldn't want to be anyone else. I feel like that post changed everything for me and I really wish I could remember who posted it!! I started practicing my own positive daily reinforcement and it completely changed how I saw myself and has still helped me today.

Another thing I see women do all the time is openly criticize themselves. Whether we just feel better saying we feel "fat" out loud or we are looking for the "no, you're not fat" comment, it isn't healthy. I know I have done this for both reasons! I think it's okay to discuss how you feel with your loved ones because sometimes if you get it off of your chest then you can work on not feeling that way. But I feel like constantly, openly criticizing yourself is really unhealthy and just makes whatever you are feeling, worse. I tried really hard to keep these thoughts to myself so I didn't start to feel negative about how I looked and that's another huge thing that helped change my thought process. Your friend compliments you on your dress, don't say you feel fat just take the compliment and realize that most of the time you're probably being hard on yourself. The picture below is from when I was in Spain three years ago (crazy how time flies) and I remember thinking I looked HUGE. Now I look at this picture and I'm like WTH???? I would probably assume my friends had that same what the hell thought when I said I looked fat that day. I read a quote that said something about how everyone deserves to look at themselves the way their loved ones look at them. 100% true.

I think it's okay to be somewhat critical to keep yourself motivated. However, most of us are down right shameful of our bodies. Even famous women who we may see as perfect have openly shared their body shaming issues. I also think social media plays a huge part in women's self esteem struggles. I remember I use to follow all of these fitness girls that just looked (unrealistically) amazing all the time. I say unrealistically because a lot of these women probably don't have social lives and spend a TON of time working on their bodies, meal prepping, etc. That lifestyle isn't realistic for the average mom, working woman, etc. Not to say you can't be fit but take into account that it's probably not worth losing your lifestyle over it. Following those type of accounts made me just feel like I was not fit enough. I had to stop following a lot of these girls and instead I found some great women on Instagram who are REALISTIC about how they look and feel and they're fit but they're healthy and live normal lives. Find some positive inspiration, not just something pretty to look at.

I'm sure men struggle with self esteem issues as well but I think it's a lot more prominent with women. I think self love is really important and very hard to come by. Hopefully, some of these things I shared will help to guide you on your own journey to a positive body image and self love! Also, listed below are a few awesome girls to follow on Instagram for a realistic and honest approach to self love, fitness, and body image.

@kaliforndee

@juliealedbetter

@em_dunc

@ohilyssa

xo,
katie lynn